That’s what she said…not always funny.

I work at a school, in the counseling arena. My office is a place where people who have been affected by violence come for support. So generally, more of a somber, respectful atmosphere. On my office door, I have a white board where I can write constructive, relevant things, like “Back in 15 minutes” or “Please do not disturb”.  Sometimes, the clients I work with will leave me notes to call them. And sometimes, I even get a “You rock! Thanks for all you do.” It’s a pretty useful thing to have at work.

One day, a few short weeks ago, I was walking down the hall towards my office when I saw a short woman wearing a beanie writing on my board. I turned my back for a minute, dropping something in our main office mailbox and headed down to see if there is something she needs to tell me in person. Before I could get there, she finished writing her note and took off down the hall.

Now, that was a busy day for me. I had been at this meeting, and that meeting, all over campus. So to let people that needed to get in touch with me know what my status was, I put “In and out all day” on the board. Her note was, in big bold writing “That’s what she said”.

To be honest, I should have seen this coming. I like to think that I am pretty good at finding those little “That’s what she said” moments and bringing everyone’s attention to them. But I was busy, and I was in work mode, which means there is nothing funny about what I do and I expect people to feel the same way.

That little brat. I was half pissed off, and half impressed.

 So weeks passed. I shared this funny little story with my dear friends, who thought it was great, some even thought it was genius.

 Last week, our campus experienced a scare when someone reported a man with a gun in the residence hall that turned out to be a false report. Nonetheless, it has scared people and also made people mad. Some would say it’s a sensitive issue.

This morning, at about 11am,  I was walking down the hall towards my office when I saw a short girl with a beanie on, and she was writing “Call the cops” .

Naturally, I got nervous for her so started walking towards her and then stopped to watch when she continued to write “Call the cops. there’s a crazy guy in (the residence hall)”. This is when I stopped watching, got pissed, stood right next to her, and started talking.

It also made for a nice intimidation tactic that I am like a foot and a half taller than she is.

I said.. “Do you need something from me?” in the least unhelpful tone I could muster.

She went “Uh, shit, um I was just messing around”.

I replied with more angry sarcasm than I knew existed “Well, it would be great if you didn’t do that again. This board is used for people who actually need some help and not for people who are just messing around.”

She went “Okay, yeah, I will never do it again” and then was frantically trying to wipe it off, which you can’t do without an eraser, which only made her panic more and me get even angrier.

I replied “Yeah, don’t worry about wiping it off, you need an eraser for it. I’ll do it. People do this stupid shit all the time”, then half screamed “Fuck!” and stormed into my office.

People, there is a difference between mumbling “that’s what she said” after your buddy says “Man, that was harder than usual” and making light of something that is very, well, heavy.

And little brats in beanies need to figure that out.

 D

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